Beginnings...and endings

I have to confess, I'm not the best at this whole journaling-thing! I've tried it off an on over the years, and sometimes it has worked better than others...but generally, I'm a deadbeat about stuff like this, so we'll see how far this goes, ok?

Oops...had to run get the phone! Sorry! Hope you didn't mind waiting! It was my beautiful bride calling on the cell phone (which I didn't get in time--have to call her back). Yeah, it's probably sappy, but I can't help always thinking of her coming down the aisle to meet me whenever she's somewhere else and she calls me. That's usually my first thought of her. She is the most beautiful person I've ever known!

So, what is it people like about blogs, anyway? I guess it's that we can be pretty fearless in writing, whereas we might shrink away from saying some things in person?? Dunno. Anyway, it seems like everybody from God on down has a blog, so I figured it's high time I got on the bandwagon. (Never let it be said that I was one to rush into any kind of fad! When I first saw cell phones in Germany back in the 80's, I thought they were just a stupid toy for rich business people to impress each other with!)

So, on to the blogging...

It's kind of sad for me today, to be honest. I'm having a good day at the office, and I have several good things to look forward to yet today, but I'm just hurting on the inside. God seems to be leading us in some directions that haven't exactly surprised us, but which still seem scary or unsafe or something. But it's that way with following God, isn't it?
If God seems safe--if following Him seems safe--then you probably don't have a very complete relationship with Him.

In The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, C.S. Lewis described it best as Mr. Beaver describes Aslan, the mighty warrior-lion who is Lewis' type of God: "Aslan is not safe! He's not like a tame lion, you know! But he is good!"

That's the way God is: He's not safe, but He is good! Nowhere did Jesus say "Come, follow Me, and all your troubles will vanish". We often describe God from the pulpit in the same glowing terms used for industral-strength household cleaners: "...removes waxy yellow buildup from your floors and you can even use it to polish your dentures!" (I swear, my Dad once bought some stuff from a neighbor who sold Amway products and the label claimed it was useful both for cleaning whitewall tires and dentures!)

No, God is not safe. But God is good. Lord, draw me into your mystery even deeper! Help me to abandon the safeguards and strongholds of this world and let me fall into the dark, mysterious, scary experience of Your personal presence. Your Word says "it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God", but I can't live apart from that presence. My life is a story, and I need to see it unfold. It's the story of Your love and faithfulness, and the world needs to hear it!

God, close the doors You need to and open those You have planned--help us to step through boldly and tumble until we fall to safety in Your arms!